December 20th 2013

It's been a tough week as I am putting together Liam's scrapbook. Already more memories, pictures, journal entries, and memorabilia than I thought we had for someone who was only with us for a brief moment. It breaks my heart looking back at a time when the world was as it should be. Liam was alive and we were joyfully looking forward to what the future held. I still find myself dreaming about what could have, what should have been. Not a day goes by that my heart doesn't physically ache over missing Liam.  Sometimes I can carry on and try to live in the moment for all it has to offer, as the world keeps quickly moving along. Other times, the sadness is more than I can bare. When I am done, all the will tangibly remain of Liam will fit into a 12X12 photo album, and a wooden keepsake box. But there are emotions, memories, and a special part of my son that I will carry with me wherever I go, and will always be a part of me. I am not sure yet how this tragic event in my life will define me, but I know it has forever altered and changed me.